I’ve been getting asked a lot lately how things are going with this fiance visa and immigration process. So for those of you playing along at home, here’s an update…

We’ve submitted the fiance visa application to the Nebraska Service Center (NSC) of the Bureau of Citizenship and Immigration Services (which is part of the Dept. of Homeland Security). All we can do right now is wait.

In this regard, I have the great misfortune of living in Michigan. The Vermont Service Center takes about 15-20 days to process fiance visa applications. No one really knows why the NSC takes so long, but they do, and since I live in Michigan, this is the way it is, no doing much about it. The communication from the NSC states that this type of visa application takes 150-180 days to process (about 5-6 months) but it seems that the current timeline is closer to 7-8 months. Since we submitted our application on December 17, eight months would bring us to August which would be cutting things close, but still okay. We’d prefer to get approval in June or July.

What happens once we get approval from the NSC, they send everything over to the US Embassy in London. We get notified that London has received our paperwork and they give us a list of documents that we need to gather together to present to them. Once we have that list completed, we let them know and give them the date by which we would like to have James enter the country. Based on that, they assign us an interview date.

At least that’s the process currently (as we understand it). Things can easily change.

James will be coming here mid-May and staying until the end of July. He’ll be going back to England for the month of August to do his Embassy interview and get the fiance visa, spend time with friends and family before moving over, and participate in Greenbelt. As soon as the US Embassy lets him (we’re hoping it will be by the end of the first week of September), he’ll enter the country on the fiance visa. From that point he won’t be able to leave again until he gets his green card which, if things stay as they are currenlty, will happen about 3 months after our wedding.

And just a bit of trivia. Green card holders are no longer called Resident Aliens. The new official term is Lawful Permanent Resident. No more martian jokes. Sorry.

It has been fascinating for me over the past several months to examine the differences between US and UK culture, particularly as they relate to the whole wedding thing.

Interestingly, for a country seemingly so enamoured of pomp and circumstance, England certainly seems to be lacking in traditions and expectations when it comes to weddings. Hmm. Perhaps I should rephrase. “Lacking in…” makes it sound like it’s a bad thing, and I don’t necessarily think that’s the case. James would most certainly object to that characterization. So let me put it this way: it has been my observation that in the U.S. there is a whole heck of a lot more flapping and fuss surrounding weddings and many more traditions for every part of the process from announcements and showers to the actual ceremony itself. They don’t even really do ‘bridal’ showers as such, one factor which led to a very curious UK registry experience.

James and I decided that it would be helpful especially for our non-web savvy UK wedding guests if we registered at a UK department store. We selected John Lewis since it’s a nice store and there’s a very large one within easy walking distance of James’ house. They also happened to be advertising their Gift List services in their display windows. So on a Wednesday afternoon 45 minutes before we were scheduled to be somewhere else (which we figured would give us plenty of time to get a registry set up and scan a few gifts), we moseyed over to John Lewis, took the escalator to the top floor, and asked about setting up a gift list. We were asked to wait for the next available associate and were seated at a registry station to wait for her. Within a few moments of her joining us and starting the process, several realizations dawned on us: a) she typed verrrry slowly + b) she was not very efficient or knowledgeable of their computer system = c) this was going to take a long time. The set-up process did, in fact, eat up all of our available time and we had to dash before we had a chance to actually scan any gifts into our registry.

Throughout the process, several things struck me as very strange. First of all, the default option for when guests make purchases from the gift list is to have John Lewis collect all of the gifts at one of their locations and then a week before the wedding, ship all of the gifts to the bride and groom. We actually had to request that a pop-up note be added to our registry so that when our guests make purchases the sales associates can see that we would prefer that guests take their purchases with them. Gifts purchased online, however, apparently cannot be shipped to the buyer but will be sent to the bride and groom’s registered address one week before the wedding. (We gave them James’ parents’ address since we’ll both be here by then.)

Secondly, the gift list is only available to the guests from six weeks before the wedding through two weeks after the wedding. This will seem very strange indeed to any Americans who have done a registry and are used to it being available to the general public as soon as the registry is set up. It’s kind of annoying for us, but I guess if you don’t have showers, why would guests want to purchase a gift more than six weeks before the wedding anyway? Oh well, not much we can do there. But don’t go to www.johnlewis.co.uk expecting to be able to look up our registry before September 10. (If you’re really curious, you can look up our registries on Amazon, Crate and Barrel, or Bed, Bath and Beyond.)

Finally, if a guest attempts to purchase an item that is no longer available, John Lewis will not inform the guest that the item is, in fact, no longer available but instead will issue us a voucher for the value of that gift. That just seems kind of rude to the guests if you ask me. But that’s how they do things.

Anyway, we went back the next afternoon and registered for our bed and bath linens along with some other cool stuff that we really liked there – placemats, whiskey tumblers, teaspoons, a mortar & pestle, and Emile Henry pie plates which seem to be cheaper to buy in the UK than in the US. If you’re coming to our wedding, feel free to shop there. But not before 10th September.

I got to spend Valentine’s Day with my honey this year. And we were joined by 19 of his closest kin.

I had met James’ parents, his brother Matthew and his sister Susan on my trip to England in November. This time I got to meet more of the extended family at a combined birthday celebration for Matthew and James’ mum and “meet Kari” party which took place at James’ parents house in Tunbridge Wells. I must say I enjoyed the event quite a bit; fun conversations, and everyone was very kind and hospitable. The food that James’ mum prepared was amazing – what a spread! Overall it was a great party. Thanks to all involved!

We also made a trip to Cambridge on the 17th where we spend a bit more time with James’ Grandad (paternal) who treated us to a wonderful lunch at a rather chi chi hotel as well as tea at his flat later in the afternoon.

James and I did get to have our own Valentine’s celebration with dinner at the Sizzling Wok (great Thai food near the Reading University campus) on the evening of the 13th.

I love you, babe!

This morning James and I went to a gallery about 5 minutes walk from his house and met with an artist/jewelry designer who is going to make our wedding rings. James spotted some of her work in the gallery window and really liked the look of it so he talked to the folks in the gallery who helped us arrange to meet with her. Her name is Gaby, and she bounds rather than walks.

Before we saw some of her rings up close I had a very vague idea of what I might want – and ended up with something quite different. But both of us like the rings a lot and we’re quite pleased.

The name of the gallery is one of the best parts of the whole thing – it’s the Jelly Leg’d Chicken Arts Centre. How great is that?

In eight months and four days we’ll be wearing them.

So I’m here in England, and James has been teaching me about style sheets and such which meant things made much more sense when he taught me how to change the look of my blog. I could have just had him do it for me, but I like knowing how things work. And now if I want to change it again later, I can do it myself. Or ask James to remind me again… Anyway, I’m rather pleased with the outcome. I hope you like it!

The latest development in wedding planning: I got my wedding dress.

What a completely giddy and totally bizarre experience is shopping for a wedding dress! I’m one of those girls that has been fantasizing about her wedding since she was very young. I’ve known since I was 9 years old that when I walked down the aisle it would be to the grand strains of the wedding march from The Sound of Music. And getting married at age 31 means that I’ve been to many, many other people’s weddings.

So on the one hand, putting on big, beautiful white dresses and flowy veils was an opportunity to realize what has remained in the realm of fantasy for decades. On the other hand it was bizarre to come face to face with reality after having the fantasy for so long. This really is MY wedding. Oh how weird.

Thanks to my wonderful friend (and maid of honor) Tanya, I was able to get through it without freaking out too much. And after an hour and a half and trying on six or seven dresses, I ended up with the first one I tried on. I know it’s a cliche but it actually happened that way. This is a big purchase. A girl has to be sure! (No refunds or exchanges on wedding dresses.)

And we killed two birds with one stone. We found bridesmaid dresses at the same store. Check two more things off the To Do List!

Disclaimer: We love the USCIS. They are just super. We’ve not had anything but lovely treatment from anyone associated with them and neither have our friends. Just in case you work for the USCIS and found your way here somehow. We’re big fans. Hurrah!

Seriously, I have no complaints about any individual associated with the USCIS – they’re just doing their jobs like you and me – and strongly suspect that my beef is more with the Bush administration and the culture of fear that they have engendered in the United States since 9/11 with things like the Patriot Act and taking photos of every foreigner to enter US soil. (Plus I find it cathartic to just randomly blame things on the Bush administration sometimes. Especially when I’ve been reading Anne Lamott…)

In the past month we’ve found out some more things about recent changes in the immigration process that have blown some of our plans to shite. To start with, James had planned to enter the US in July on a visa waiver, return to the UK in mid-August for Greenbelt and his K-1 Fiance Visa interview at the London Embassy, then enter the US on the fiance visa in early September. Well, we found out – and really this does make sense when you stop to think about it – that James can’t enter the US on the visa waiver in July if the London Embassy already has been notified of our application for the K-1. Which, if timing is similar then to what it is now, they almost certainly will have by mid-July.

So that leaves us with three other options. Either James can arrive in the US before the London Embassy gets our paperwork which would most likely mean leaving his job early. Or he can come in July as planned and skip Greenbelt (which would be nigh torture for him). Or he could stay in the UK until after Greenbelt (which would be nigh torture for me). Not a great choice to have to make.

The other problem is that unlike less than a year ago when couples could go get the greencard (via Adjustment of Status, or AOS) the day after their wedding, now we need to go file for AOS as soon as possible after our wedding and wait 90 days for an interview at which we then would – if all goes well – get James’ greencard. Which means we probably will not be able to go to England as planned for Christmas ’04. The only way that James can leave the country and then reenter after getting married but before getting the greencard is to get Advanced Parole, but we’ve been told they only give those out in emergency situations and also give themselves 90 days to issue those. Which brings us back to where we started. We’ve been strongly advised not to even risk leaving the country until James has his greencard. So while not being able to spend next Christmas with James’ family in England is not the end of the world, it is disappointing.

Sigh…

On the good news side of things, wedding plans are coming along swimmingly. We’ve started registering at a number of stores near you (or maybe not so near, but at least easily accessible online). We’ve reserved a block of rooms at a hotel for our out-of-town guests. (More details about all of that coming soon.) And James has now seen the Post Family Farm and likes it. Just need to send in the deposit and reservation form for that.

And perhaps the best news of all. I found sandals for the wedding that are tres wonderful. I adore them. Now I just need a dress to go with them!

(p.s. the tres above is a reference to Eloise, not me trying to be pretentious. Just in case you rolled your eyes for a second there. Really. 😉 )

…it becomes necessary to delete the duplicates. Well, in the case of CDs anyway, it just makes sense.

To that effect, James and I have been working through our CD collections to eliminate duplicates. As a result we have a few for sale. Let us know if you’re interested.

The first Notice of Action has been received. The USCIS received our petition for a K-1 Fiance(e) Visa on 17th December 2003. The stationery it was printed on still says “U.S. Department of Justice – Immigration and Naturalization Service.” They need to get their act together.

The letter indicates that this type of petition takes 150 to 180 days to process so we will start looking for the next envelope from the DHS around the end of May-beginning of June.

In the meantime, we continue to make plans and every now and then catch our breath a bit.

Woohoo! The K-1 Fiance visa application is in the mail!! It feels so good to have that off my back. Wow. It was quite a process getting everything together, but with much help from James as well as friends Jenna and Trevor (who are now at the back end of this process) and others, it’s done.

Note to anyone who is doing this: the USCIS website has lots of helpful and detailed information for putting this stuff together.

This morning I brought the whole packet to Nancy O. who works with citizenship and immigration issues at Congressman Vern Ehlers’ office. She looked through it and said it was one of the best put together application packets she had ever seen and thought that we probably have plenty of time to get this all processed in time for an October 22 wedding. She even offered to mail it for me so we could track it. It’s very nice when the U.S. Government pays the postage. 🙂

Now the waiting game begins and we start looking for the first NOA (Notice of Action – this one just telling us that they got it) in the mail.

Our fate is now in the hands of the Department of Homeland Security. How’s that for scary?!?