I bought my veil this weekend. (For $10 at a discount craft store – thank you very much, Larissa!) That in itself might not be so momentous as to be blogworthy, but a comment that one of James’ friends made to him about my wearing a veil seeming awfully traditional has got me thinking about traditions, particularly when it comes to weddings.
I think one of the reasons that wedding planning with James has been so fun is that each of us is equally willing to toss tradition if it doesn’t suit us. We don’t see the need to have an equal number of attendants standing up with each of us, neither do we feel it’s necessary for me to have all female attendants (although I am) and James to have all male attendants (he’s not). We want to have stand up for us who we want to have stand up for us. And so we will.
I happen to like the look of a veil. I like how it makes me feel all… bridey. I’m not going to pull it down over my face when I walk down the aisle. Far be it from me to tell anyone else they shouldn’t though. It’s just not for me.
We’re going to have the music we want to have at our wedding. Some of it you may have heard at other weddings. I bet much of it you won’t have. (We’ve yet to iron out all those details.)
Some of the traditions that I want to keep are specifially American traditions (or North American traditions? don’t remember exactly what my friends from Canada have done in their weddings), and I want to keep them because they are very meaningful to me – like having James walk our grandparents and his parents down the aisle. (I want both of my parents to walk me down.) This is not generally done in Britain, however, and James was rather taken aback when I suggested it to him. He’s still not too sure about it.
Okay, partly I want to include this tradition because it’s meaningful but also just because it’s one thing (one of a very few things) I do actually want to do for tradition’s sake. Also, I know how my Oma would cluck if James didn’t walk her down the aisle
And who knows – maybe our wedding would end up looking rather different if it were taking place in the UK? I think that in the end it would be fairly similar because when it comes down to it, most of all we want our wedding to be a reflection of who we are. The best weddings I’ve been to are those where the personalities of the bride and groom – individually and as a couple – shine through.